Self-Love: How To Love Thyself
- MARYANN ALLEN
- Feb 15, 2022
- 2 min read
Love yourself! Do you know what that means? Is loving yourself putting yourself first? Is it doing things that make you happy? There is a common misunderstanding of what this means and how to properly love yourself. Firstly, how and when do you know you need self-love? The most common sign is when we experience pain caused by others. This immediately let's us put up a defense to protect us, and we do this by building walls and shutting people out. For some, they do not know how to return from this protective phase and become stuck in a place of fear. For others, it is temporary and they are back at it, doing exactly what they did before but in a different way. Loving yourself should be easy but it's not. It requires hard work because there is no blue print, and the work looks different for everyone. Like raising a child, though some instructions may be general, it depends on many factors to determine the right steps to take. Below are few important steps to take when deciding to get on this journey
Know yourself - it's almost impossible to love yourself if you do not know what you're loving. So firstly, you go on a personal discovery adventure, understanding your needs, likes, dislikes, strengths, weaknesses, mistakes you've made, character, personality, and what your optimum self would be, etc.
Make peace with all of you - accept your mistakes and that at such times you didn't know better, and forgive the you at those times. Appreciate the good about you, and fall in love with that part of you, and lastly, identify the you that you want to be and go after her.
Pursue the optimum you - the optimum you is the you that you desire but aren't there yet. This is when you take your limitations and you make them goals. At this point, it becomes easier because you know what you want and what you won't settle for. This is when you set healthy boundaries, when YOU become a priority. At this point you project peace, happiness, self-confidence, higher self-worth, and higher value. This attracts the right people to you, and they come knowing who they're coming to and what is required.
Self love is from within, it's allowing yourself operate in your greatest capacity. Anything short of your true ability and potential is robbing yourself of love. Therefore you love yourself by allowing yourself to heal, because operating in hurt and anger robs you of expressing the optimum you. The goal is to not live life partially when you could experience the full joy of life. When you have discovered you, and loved yourself, it makes it easier for others to love and respect you because you provide them a clear path. This year choose to go on the self-love journey and experience your true self.
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